POETRY

THINGS MY MOTHER NEVER TAUGHT ME

Sheila, 30-B-2 FPE

All the other girls I study seem to know just what to do

All their lives they've been absorbing everything their Mothers knew

So I'll study to be like them, though it's quite an uphill fight I'm a self-appointed daughter, and I've got to do this right!

The high heels feel quite natural, I'm right at home in futs But why do my sheer stockings look like I've been picking burrs? Although I sit quite lady-like, or so it seems to me The pictures always look as if I lived up in a tree!

Why can't I wear red shoes with green? They look all right to me But then my room-mate up and says "Well, dig that Christmas Tree." A floor-length dress for morning didn't seem to make a hit She said "Not in this neighborhood; the cops will have a fit."

I've learned to light a cigarette, and not touch off my hair, (Dynel burns with a yellow flame, and quite fast, so take care.) But when I hold one in my mouth and use both hands to talk Even the other TV girls I know all seem to balk.

Though I've spent hours reading Mademoiselle and Seventeen, My make-up still looks strong, even for a burlesque queen And memorizing pages out of Glamour, I enjoy

But it can't erase my childhood, wasted looking like a boy!

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